It's HOT HOT HOT.

15/1 - Got into Chennai train station about 05:00, loaded up my gear then sat on a bench to make a plan. "Why bother?" you may ask and you would be right. It's busy in the train station at 5.00, but outside it is hectic, buses fleeing in and out, people buzzing around, rickshaws toot-tooting.
"Take 5 Gil and reassess the plan". Dumped the gear on an unused kiosk and got nattering to a Belgian lad who started to give me a run down of his tails of woe from working in Asia for the last 15 years. I think he just wanted a natter and was a good bloke. He made a good point about the people here always smiling, not matter what their situation. People have nowt and still manage to smile and be pleasant. There were a load of people living in a shanti village lining the train tracks from Ooty and they were out waving and smiling at the train, which gave people on the train a big smile, me included. A lad told me that there are people there everyday, as the daily train from Ooty arrives.
After the chat, I decided to stick with my plan, for better or for worse, head of to the Egmore area to the Regent hotel, if it is full, wander around and find another.
So to the Regent. "No room at this in Mary!". Who you calling Mary, I'm a Mackem. (Our Mick will get that). Next, too expensive. Next, full. I'm starting to sweat like a shower head and it's only 6:00, so when a persistent rickshaw driver pesters me the plan went west. He took me to a hotel. "500 metres Bas!" 2 kilometres later it was full. "No worry Bas. No rent no pay." Back we go a kilometre, to another. I lugged my bags upstairs and along to check the room. I took it. Goodness knows why it is a dump. Never mind one night only. I must have been flagging, this is the biggest dump yet. Gave the rickshaw lad Rs 50 and he was happy. 1 out of 2 ain't bad.
Going by his driving, I think he was on speed. It is not the done thing to check before you pull out here, it seems the responsibility of the person you are cutting up to avoid you.
Not a good start to Chennai. My first impression is it's a dump. Shower, shorts and sandals and I'm on the streets heading for Air Deccan to book a flight to Kolkata. It can be done on the web, but they ask for your PIN number. Sack that.
I'm in the Triplicane area and it is really poor. Lots of people sleeping on the streets, which are a mess. Going by the ride from the train station, most of Chennai is this way and it is steaming hot. I am stopping every 100 metres or so, whacking loads of water down my neck, my T-shirt and hanky are moping most of it up as it comes back out. Sat outside a police station to check the map and get my bearings. 4th exit of the roundabout along Mount Rd. What roundabout, it is a dodgem car ride. A school kid said hello, so I asked for Mount Rd. He pointed the way I was going, but it seems a bit too soon, however he is the local. After a while I saw a landmark so checked the map. He was right, it is Mount Road, just the wrong direction. About turn.
It's the rush hour and I would chance a bus, but the young 'uns are hanging on the outside of the bus, one foot on the step and one arm through a window, from the outside in. Not a good idea for me to try, so kept on sweating down the road. This is one of the main drags in Chennai, some bloke stops and walks over to a wall and pees there. He is dressed in office dress. I have only been in Egmore and Triplicane, but I am not impressed with Chennai so far, perhaps it is a bit unfair to say so this early. The traffic is more hectic than Mumbai, there are no spectacular buildings and it is steaming hot. It looks chaotic, the traffic, the buildings, the people, but it is probably not, if I can get a flight today, I'm out of here, unfairly to the city, but I'm off. Grabbed a tea and pineapple juice at a greasy spoon. I have only seen one cafe so far and regret not stopping for breakfast. Plod around the corner and "This is where they keep all the restaurants". I'm in for some snap, vegetable, dosa massala, bloody lovely and huge. Dosa is like a crispy savoury pancake, just for the uninitiated. Got a black coffee, no sugar, but with sugar. I will have to learn Hindi for no sugar, but I think they speak Tamil here, so it wouldn't help.
A bit more miandering towards Air Deccan. Chennai strikes me as an old fashioned working class city. Lots of the blokes still wear lungis/sarongs and peeing anywhere seems to be the done thing. I have spotted more blokes at it.
There is a flight out today and I am Rs500 short, they only take cash. I'll kill that bloody Murphy. Nip off to get the money. 1st ATM wont take my card, trog to another, no joy, another, no joy. Something smells fishy around here, it could be me, but I don't think so. Canara Bank, I know works, trog, trog, trog. It didn't. Phoned Barclaycard. The stupid, no commonsense, no intelligence, immbecilles have blocked my last remaining card, even though Kelly has put it in credit. "People cant think for themselves, if the computer says do it, it is done. There's a distinct lack of initiative, who's working who" said the sweaty grumpy old man. "I guess the computers aren't talking to each other" said the still ranting grumpy old man, but I should not complain too much, as the computers are paying for this holiday, or my ability to bluff it along working on them.
The outcome, I am too late for the flight, so there is no rush to get back to the hotel now. Another plan bites the dust. Time for a aimless wander around town, down some of the backstreets, passed Amir Mahal. I hope the Taj is better. Perhaps missing the flight is a good thing, Chennai is starting to grow on me, especially when I hit the Jam Bazzaar, a local market selling fruit and other foods. These streets have lots of crumbling character, still very poor and working class, but the history can be felt in them. The city doesn't have the British colonial feel Mumbai has, but I believe it was one of the big cities for the Brits. I should stay and see somemore, perhaps sweat off some of my big belly, but I have booked my flight for tomorrow now. Miandered my way back to the street I think the hotel is on, but it looks completely different, so plonked on a high kerb to check the map, but didn't need to when I spotted a shop sign with the address Triplicane high street. This is it, you dosey git, you are coming in from the other end. I wonder if I will ever find my way back to Chorley, so much for the trained killer.
Whilst I was on the kerb, an old fella came over and sat with me. He had a young kid with him, he is a Grandad, so we have plenty to chew the fat about. We had a really good natter. He told me in the next 2 months, Chennai gets too hot to walk on the streets.
Off to the internet cafe, I haven't had an e-fix for about 4 days and I'll miss the afternoon heat. Back pack and shower. I did some tide-me-over dhobi this morning and it is dry, big surprise in this heat, NOT.
I was going to go to the river or beach this evening, but could not stir myself, again unfairly on Chennai, although I have my doubts about the river. It is an early start tomorrow, so didn't want a late night. The early start is because this is a 24hr hotel/dump. Checkout is 24 hrs after checking, which was 07:00. I never checked that.
Went for a bit of snap. I could not find the one in the Lonely Planet,(LP) so went in a nice one I found, which turned out to be the one in the LP. I wonder if I'll ever find my way back to Chorley.
Must confess to hitting the cake shop too, but only for 1 piece. A lady asked me, for the 3rd time today to buy her some rice. I said no, but it makes me wonder and embarrassed because I am eating a bit of cake. It's not the first time in India I have felt like this. You would think all of us eating and getting fat would be able to do something to help. "We are a funny lot us humans." said the guilty grumpy old man. There must be an answer. Starting to try and think too much, not a good quality of mine, so I am off to bed and will ignore it, like most of us.